Riverside Market Cafe

Not going to name names here but there is a rather (let's go with) pretentious bar up the road from me in Fort Lauderdale that serves all sorts of beers from local and microbreweries. It is a (um, struggling for adjectives) hip place to go if you want to allegedly #drinklikealocal and enjoy a $100 bar tab. I do like it but probably more for the very well designed interior more than anything else. I feel I can't go in there and order a Bud because the overtly hipster staff are silently judging me and making dives to the break room to comment on my apparent mainstream tendencies.

This is not some unconfirmed paranoia I will have you know, the bar in question posted this lovely picture on their Facebook page earlier this week.

Obviously I am neither smart, logical or sane. I will give you sane but not logical and smart. I am bloody clever.

Now, it is not that I do not enjoy interesting beers. I most certainly do, but when I am being stared down by a Skrillex lookalike impatiently waiting for my order I panic and order something silly that I regret. AND when I do go to this bar I tend to only do so when their are drink specials on because, you know, I am not the CEO of a Fortune 500 company and paying over $10 for a beer and having to tip a grumpy hipster on top of that does not sit well with my wallet. During their 'happy hour' you feel even MORE pressure to order fast because now there are a whole bunch of people waiting to panic buy beer around you. It is stressful. I don't want stress when I go to a bar. I want beer. Bars are for beer not stress.

So here we are at the point of the post. Riverside Market Cafe. What a gem. What a little legend place. I'm going to say there are 6 tables inside and then a big area with couches. More importantly though, they have fridges where you can browse unhindered until you have settled on your desired brew. The staff look like normal people, they leave you alone until you need them, they are happy to assist you if you would like them to and they don't have weird hairdos and nerd glasses.

Best of all was when we took all of our empty bottles and our food invoice to the cashier (that is how you pay - it's genius). $67. I was amazed. That was 14 beers and a massive pizza (there were four of us by the way, please don't think I can drink 14 beers by myself) it works out to like $3.80 a beer. The prices do vary depending on what you are drinking obviously but seriously, there is no compare. Well there is actually. I will tell you what I paid the other night at bar #1 when my husband and I went for a snack and a drink. $80. For tacos and 4 beers.

Go to Riverside Market Cafe if you are in Fort Lauderdale. Go there and relax. 

How to be a Yachtie | Part 2: Is Yachting for You?

YES! I want to work on a superyacht! I want to travel the world and see new things! It sounds AWESOME!

Living on a boat, a luxury one at that, sailing from port to port, hanging out with friends, eating food prepared by a chef and being paid to be there sounds like the biggest hole in one job you could ever land. It is a great job to be fair but you have to understand that you will not be sipping cocktails on the sundeck or sweating it out in the on board gym. You will be washing, drying, polishing and detailing most of the time. When you are not busy doing those things you will be serving the guests, whether you are taking them out on tender and jet ski rides or giving them dinner. Working on yachts means working long hours. Working hard for long hours.

Nantucket, Summer 2012

Yachting is the very definition of OTT, for both owners and their crew. Owners will always think that their boat is the biggest and most expensive, they love to sit on deck and gossip about the other boats around them. Most of them will pretend to know more than they actually do. They say things like, “I hear that boat only has furniture by Armani Casa, well we have Pucci towels and three sets of Baccarat crystal.” It is sad. The funny thing is most owners are pretty normal at home, they eat normal food off normal plates and drink out of normal glasses. They shower in their normal showers and dry themselves with normal towels. They make their own tea and coffee, probably wash their own cup afterwards too because they only have the one housekeeper. But as soon as they come within range of their yacht they change into what their definition of a wealthy person is.

Maybe it is the cold towel that is presented to them on arrival. I don’t know. But give it a few seconds and they will be ordering skinny soy lattes to be brought to the Bridge Deck that they can sip on (more like look at, guests barely finish things, they just like holding them) whilst their luggage is being unpacked and all the clothes are being folded and put away, re-pressed if necessary. Thoughtfully you present them with cashmere throws because it is a bit breezy out, these get used for all of five minutes and then they decide to move indoors to the Sky Lounge leaving a trail of blankets and cups behind them. As soon as you have cleared the decks you get asked to prepare six different pots of tea because they have just read in a magazine that tea is very good for you. Have you heard of green smoothies? Yes? Can you make us one? Can we have a cheese plate, but only white cheese? Can I have a sparkling water? Have you seen my phone? What is the internet code? Could I get another latte? Can you take the dogs for a walk? Could you ask the chef to come out? Seriously. Yesterday you were taking your own chicken out the freezer to defrost and today you are asking to see your chef. Acting rich, it is a guest’s favourite thing.

It isn’t just the guests who are a bit anal, it is the crew too. That cushion isn’t straight, did you make that coffee with one and a quarter spoons of sugar, you know that is how she likes it? Boys, there are fingerprints on the stainless around the gangway, are there enough towels on the sundeck? I noticed some dust has settled on the portside windowsill, are they eating off the Tiffany or the Hermes this evening? Chef would you like martini glasses for the ceviche? The dayhead has been used, please clean it. It has been 15 minutes I should check on them.

If you feel you are able to put up with guest quirks and hardcore crew then you also need to consider what sort of path you would like to follow within yachting. There are no hard and fast rules that say, ‘Boys outside, girls inside’ it just sort of ends up that way. Saying that, my best friend (who is a girl) is a deckhand, I have worked with a female engineer and male stewards are very common. If you enjoy working outside, driving jetskis and washing the big boat (of course) then you should consider a job on deck. If you prefer to maintain the interior and tend to the guests then look into becoming a steward/ess. Similarly if engines are your thing go down the engineering route.

The main piece of advice I like to give new / prospective crew is that you should not enter this industry with the view to only complete one season. Working in an industry as high profile as yachting demands professionalism. If you are just hanging about for a gap year it is unlikely that you will have the same attitude and work ethic as a person who is climbing the ladder to be Captain. You need to understand that you will have access to very wealthy and often famous people and they expect a certain level of service and attention to detail. If  you show any sort of slack, especially in your first year, you will be eaten alive by your fellow crew members. As I said earlier, we all take ourselves way too seriously.

It is absolutely not my intention to put you off yachting at all, at the end of the day it is a fantastic way to travel and meet new people and that is why we all decided to join the industry. None of us ever thought, ‘Wow! You mean I get to make beds?!’ We do it because we love boats, we love the sea and we hate the thought of being stagnant.

Tweet / comment if you have any questions.

Skincare for Seafarers

Skincare tips for yachties / lazy people / people who don’t have all that much time

I don’t want to say I have always been very rigorous with my skincare routine because I haven’t to be honest. I always wash my face and moisturize, sometimes I tone and sometimes I exfoliate. I had a small problem with acne when I was growing up but it calmed down once I got older and now I get the occasional blemish / break out patch. I have never felt like I had problem skin though, I had never felt the need to pour luxurious products all over my face. I thought those things were for old people. Until I realized that I was maybe getting on in years and that I should perhaps amend my routine accordingly.

Also, working on boats means that you are at sea most of the time, or at least exposed to sea air and lots of sun. If that is not the case you are probably in a shipyard and that is even worse. My skin is at it’s poorest in shipyards, so much dirt flying about.  I wiped my face down the other day after going out for a quick cycle and the little cotton pad came out black. I was horrified and ever since then I have become rather pedantic with my routine.

Now, being on a boat also means that you have little time for lengthy routines and little space for all sorts of different face potions so I have been forced to choose rather wisely. I do tend to change up products, but I am very strict not to buy too many different ones that do the same thing at the same time.

So here it is:

Morning

Sleep is very important, if I can maximize sleeping in time I have won. So my morning routine is very basic.

-       Cleanse

-       Tone

-       Apply eye cream

-       Moisturize (making sure the moisturizer has a high SPF – if I know I will be outside for a lot of the day I apply sunscreen on top of that – and wear a hat and sunglasses, people will make fun of me now but I will always be the one with the fewest wrinkles)

Evening

I tend to have slightly more time in the evenings and also the appeal of ‘washing the day off’ tends to make me more inclined to lengthen my routine slightly.

-       Pre Cleanse

-       Cleanse

-       Tone

-       Exfoliate

-       Apply eye cream

-       Moisturize

-       Apply serum

Weekly

I use ‘weekly’ loosely, sometimes I can achieve it but I mainly do these things when I have a good old chance.

-       Apply face mask

-       Steam and essential oil massage

-       Apply teabags to my eyes

Now, the tips I have are mainly for yachties but I’m pretty sure they are universally applicable. As I mentioned before we do live in small spaces and share bathrooms with other crew, if we are chartering then there is barely time for anything other than sleep and we do subject our skin to very harsh elements. There is a reason for those fishermen looking the way they do. I don’t want you girls (and boys mind you) looking like old fishermen.

-       When choosing new products always get a sample. Try it for a few days before you commit to buying the big bottle, that way you will not be cluttering your cabin with something that you may not like and be too lazy to return.

-       If you have found something you like (and you are in a major port – I usually do this in America) order enough of it online to last you a season. The last thing you want is to run out of something and have to pay to have it shipped to the Caribbean, only for it to be lost / seized by customs.

-       Often online stores will offer discounts, free samples and free shipping so keep that in mind too.

-       If you are in a shipyard pre cleansing is very important and you should be washing your face three or four times a day. I know it is harsh but during these times I use a very gentle, fragrance and alcohol free cleanser and just keep moisturizing. At night wash your face after taking a shower.

-       If you are going to be outside, especially when you are underway, layer your sunscreen. Choose a moisturizer with a high SPF, layer a sunscreen on top of that. If I have guests on board and I am wearing make up I will use a foundation with an SPF and a loose powder with an SPF. Lots of layers but I don’t look burnt or weather beaten ever.

-       Do your own facials, unless you have a therapist you know and love it is better to treat your own skin. If you share your cabin with other girls then make a night of it. Exchange tips, it will strengthen the group dynamic and give you something else to do besides rushing off to the nearest bar.

-       Wash your pillowcase often. Wash your sheets often too, but you don’t want to be putting your face onto a germy old pillow each night.

-       Obviously going to the beach is a big part of being a yachty. Your boat is probably in a prime location, you have no guests, go ahead go and take photos of you and your mates frolicking about in the turquoise water but keep applying sunscreen. Once every 30 minutes at least. When you get back to the boat make sure to properly remove all the build up and give your skin a treat.

-       DRINK WATER. ALL. THE. TIME.

-       Try get enough sleep, sometimes it is hard but if I ever need a rest at a difficult time where people may be in and out of the cabin I always wear eyeshades and put my iPod on.

Ok, I hope this helped J

Have good ones.

How to be a Yachtie | Part 1

This is the first part in a series of posts I will be writing about being a crew member on Super Yachts. 

What is the view from your desk? This is mine.

Three years ago I was making packing lists in my bedroom in South Africa, I was about to leave home for the first time and not just move into my own apartment but move overseas. I didn’t know how long for and I didn’t really know specifically where. Well I had a place to stay but my ultimate goal was to climb aboard a big old yacht and start traveling around earning some money and meeting new people.

My first yacht and it's sports fishing boat, Highbourne Cay, Bahamas

Miraculously I achieved this within a week of arriving in America. A year later I met my husband and today I just can’t believe the lovely journey I have been on.

My best friend came to the industry a little after me and we bump into each other in various places around the world, it is all far too exciting. I have advised so many people on how to get started in yachting and all the necessary things you need to have in order before you leave your hometown for what could be three months or thirteen years, so I thought I would put it all in writing in one place. It will save my fingers and my sanity.

I will post an installment every week and you are more than welcome to comment / tweet me for any extra bits you would like to know.

UPDATE: Read Part 2 here

Traveling? Read This for some Fancy Tips.

Airports. Wow. Have you ever been more competitive in your life? I haven’t. I was on my school swimming team and I didn’t compete with as much heart as I do at the airport. I MUST be the best traveller, other than George Clooney in that movie.

I roll my eyes at people who cannot perform the quick remove shoes, belt, watch, jacket maneuver like I can. I tut furiously at those who do not remove their laptops and liquids. “No ma’am, you cannot bring your soda through.” Facepalm. Seriously, facepalm.

I get so caught up in it too. So caught up. And angry. I know I shouldn’t, I always find other people’s airport stories a little tiresome so I do understand that I shouldn’t be banging on about my own but I have a blog now so there you go.

Anyway, I travel a fair amount so I thought I would share some of the things I do that I have found useful.

-       Don’t take a wheely bag as your carry on luggage. Wheely bags are good for one thing, wide smooth airport floors. Once you are out of the airport and having to navigate uneven sidewalks and stairs you are SOL. Carrying them through airplane aisles is another fun time. Look back and see how many people you have concussed on the way to your seat. I use a bag from eBags called the Motherlode TLS Weekender, it is amazing, you can check it or carry it on. I will do a formal review of it soon.

-       Don’t stress yourself out (rich coming from me). Make sure you arrive early for your flight, resign yourself to the fact that a travel day is a waiting around day. When I fly home I travel for around 30 hours so arriving an extra hour early is not too much of a sacrifice. If you are on time and you are where you should be in the airport then you will never run the risk of being that muppet who holds up the plane. Also, you cannot control airplane delays, you can control personal delays. Get it together.

-       Flat shoes please ladies! I don’t care how adept you are at walking in high heels, I don’t need you teetering around in front of me. I advise wearing shoes with socks so when you have to take them off at security your feet don’t actually touch the yucky floor. Shoes you can slip on and off are great, I usually wear flat booties, they take a little while to get back on but there are little chairs and benches just beyond security where you can sit and reassess your life for a bit. No need to get flustered.

-       This is my getting through the gate routine: Take two containers and place laptop and document folder in one (they get snotty if you cover your laptop with stuff), place scarf, jacket, shoes, watch, belt and liquids bag in the other. Place bag on conveyer belt in front of containers. Keep your eyes on the officials at all times, don’t move until they have told you to. Stand in whatever retarded pose they want you to stand in. Usually it involves making a diamond shape above your head. Collect all your belongings and carry them to the little chairs / benches so you are not crowding the security area. Get dressed.

-       While you are waiting at your boarding gate / the bar / Starbucks do yourself a favour and make a ‘take to your seat’ bag. Mine includes an iPad, iPod, phone, extra socks, water (from beyond security ß sneaky tip), Noise cancelling headphones, eye shades and a pen. Always take a pen. I put all of this is a little shopping bag, those canvas ones you get, and carry it separately. When we get to our seat my husband will just place our carry ons into the overhead bin and we will sit down with all the bits and pieces we need for a happy flight and minimal time spent blocking up the aisle.

-       Carry antibacterial wipes. I put these in my ‘take to your seat’ bag as well, I also have face wipes and wet wipes. Plane bathrooms are vomit inducing to put it mildly. I know it is anal and OCD but I will Clorox everything around me. Call me what you wish. Wet Ones come in handy after mealtimes when the bathroom queue is long and the stewardesses are still patrolling the aisles. Those Crest Wisp disposable toothbrushes are pretty good too, don’t use them instead of brushing your teeth but if there is a queue / the person next to you is sleeping it is better than hanging around with a dirty mouth.

-       Be quiet, the last time I flew I had just managed to dose off and the lady next to me struck up a really loud conversation with someone across the plane and she was talking about me! Not rudely, but still. Just use your inside voice. This comes in handy when you don’t want to get slapped in the face with a meal tray.

-       Drink water. We each buy a 1.5l bottle from one of the little stores beyond the security gate and finish it. Flying is very dehydrating and the food they give you has a really high sodium content. Drink water. Also, I will almost always have a sneaky beer before I fly but I rarely ever imbibe on the plane.

-       If you are flying long haul and you are a poor sleeper then take sleeping tablets. Some people are fine with the over the counter types, I prefer to get a prescription because I wake up refreshed and rested, not grumpy and looking like Gollum. If you are taking prescription medication carry the script with you and definitely don’t drink. You will be a hot mess.

-       Once you have landed and the doors are open, sit. My husband taught me this one. Disembarkation is such a mission if you try to be the first person off. You stand for at least 10 minutes before the line moves and then you have to fuss about in the overhead locker. No. Just sit and wait for a lull, then leave. Best advice ever.

-       American airports are have a Smart e-Cart system which basically means you pay for a trolley that you are not really allowed to take in certain areas and you only get your money back at the little station where they are all kept which is not central by any stretch of the imagination. If you can carry your bags then do. We carry duffel bags, my next purchase will be a wheely duffel bag so once I am out the airport I can sling it over my shoulder and not worry about the devil curbs.

-       Guess how many black and blue bags there are on a carousel? A million. Fact. Guess how many red bags there are? Also a million. People buy red and pink bags because they think, ‘OOH, I am so smart, I will see this from a mile away.’ Everyone does it. Mark your bags distinctly, my Granny made me pompoms one year and I tied those to the handle. Another thing is 95% of the time (my statistic and figures are all totally accurate <- Foul lie) your bag will come through upside down. It’s like the baggage handler’s cruel joke. Don’t crowd the carousel, don’t climb on the carousel, if you are travelling with someone then elect one of you to stand at the carousel. Don’t make things difficult. Please.

-       Finally, have a plan. Never get to an airport and think, ‘Ok well I will just take a cab. ‘ If you know where you are going and what to expect then you cannot be swindled. If you are being picked up by someone then that is great but if not then be smart. Find out where your accommodation is in relation to the airport. Google map it before you leave. If there is a hotel shuttle, great, if not well then you may have to take a cab. Sometimes you have to take a little train, there is usually somebody on hand to help you with that. When in doubt ask the cleaning staff, security are snotty and awful, the information people are usually bored and over it but the cleaning staff know the airport well and are always happy to help.

Be smart, travel safe and be aware. Oh and shop Duty Free!!!